With International Men’s Day taking place this week, DENISE McNAMARA met with one Galway psychotherapist to discover that more males than ever are seeking help to deal with life’s challenges.

Psychotherapist Mary Lynn spent the earlier part of her practice in sessions with female clients and delivering programmes aimed at menopausal women or those experiencing a midlife crisis.

But more and more men began to reach out, looking for help in dealing with life’s challenges.

After she retrained and became a psychotherapist eight years ago, she worked with the non-profit counselling service Let’s Get Talking.

She had only one male client. Now in her private practice, up to 40% are male, with lengthy waiting lists to attend sessions at her rooms at the Druid Building on Flood Street in the heart of the city.

It is clear there is a big gap in services for males who are feeling increasingly marginalised.

“There is a lot of anxiety and depression and confusion about identity. Many men I see just seem to find it hard to see where they belong, where they fit in at work, at home. It’s something that [President-elect Donald] Trump has tuned into – young white males and men in midlife who feel forgotten about,” she reflects.

“Men’s mental health is clearly a serious societal issue that needs to be addressed. Every three in four suicides are men and suicide issues among young men has risen by 40% since 2010. Following Covid 19, 51% of Irish men said their mental health has been negatively affected by restrictions and lockdown.”

Young men are strongly influenced by their peers and controversial online influencers such as Andrew Tate rather than parents.

Many are more concerned about getting bigger and bulking up than what is going on emotionally, believes Mary. They are dropping out of college and school at a far higher rate than girls.

“When it comes to men in their mid-forties, I’m finding that a lot of them are leaving jobs they may have had for years. Whatever motivated them when they were younger is no longer motivating them.

“Meanwhile many women are gearing up their careers as their kids get older. If men are used to being the breadwinner, that throws up all sorts of issues and struggles.

“Most women are better at socialising, speaking to each other, carving out time for a coffee, a walk. But men are just not as good at doing that. And if they’re working from home they may feel very cut off from other people.

“The number one cause of anxiety and depression is loneliness.”

Therapy – once regarded as an American phenomenon – is proving to be one effective avenue for help. It offers a non-judgemental safe space where they can examine their past, present and future.

“It’s not just about looking at your childhood stuff, but this is important to work out if we’re following the same patterns. It’s a place they can question and reason and work through decisions. Choice is wonderful but it also brings anxiety. This is the one life we have, and it can be hard to get to the right decision.”

The native of Ballina, Co Mayo, knows all about making tough decisions.

Pictured: Psychotherapist Mary Lynn