Eir have my cash and I can’t get it back!

Charlie Adley

Double Vision with Charlie Adley

If it has only happened to me then I’m just unlucky; if it’s happening to many of you, it’s what we might diplomatically describe as very troubling. After years of being obliged to be an Eir customer, I thought I was finally free. They’d had me monopolised by the short and curlies for ages, overcharging me for calls that should’ve been part of my bundle and proving a nightmare to deal with.

When they ran fibre broadband into my home, it was impossible to resist. Due to that aforementioned monopoly, I’d no choice. Eir were the only provider.

At that time I was paying 427 different communication companies the GDP of a small country each month, so I sold my entire soul to Eir.

A landline, two mobiles, internet and, god help us, Eir TV, which has an interface designed by a blindfolded wildebeest.

To be fair, once they wholly owned me, Eir failed to overcharge me at all.

Then I was forced to move house, far from fibre broadband. It was the proverbial ill wind, as it allowed me to rid myself of Eir.

Or so I thought.

Naturally I was completely unsurprised that giving notice on my bundle was far more complicated than it needed to be. After a visit to the shop, several calls and emails, I finally received their formal confirmation of my cancellation request.

They said they’d cut off my broadband two days before the end of my service period, and the phones were going to go … well, they weren’t exactly sure, but soon.

I just obeyed, even when the archaic sods demanded: “You must return all TV and fibre broadband equipment to us within 30 days after your service is cancelled to avoid any charges.”

Do what? Send it all back? Nobody asks for that! You’re ‘avin’ a larf!

To read Charlie’s column in full, please see this week’s Galway City Tribune.

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